With all the upheaval of the last few weeks, I feel really grateful to be working a good program in AA.
As I sift through new emotions and feelings, adjust to being back to work, navigate the trials and joys of being in a relationship, and strive to to continue pursuing my personal goals I’ve found myself busy and overwhelmed. And while there’s nothing bad going on in my life, the now constant pull of life and its responsibilities can leave me feeling out to sea.
This week, I went to at least one AA meeting a day, sometimes two. It gives me the foundation I needed in the day. An anchor. A semblance of normalcy that I’ve come to depend on. While my program has waxed and waned in the past nine months, AA has shown up for me when I truly needed it, and, I have shown up for it.
Some mornings have been tough. When my alarm chimes at 5:30AM, there are a plethora of reasons that I could stay in bed. But, I’ve asked myself every morning I’ve woken up this week, what more important? Another hour of sleep or a grounded and positive start to my day in a meeting? The answer, every day, has been: Get to a meeting.
In AA, the saying goes that meeting makers make it. It’s true. The more meetings I go to, the more I see the good things in my life. It’s easy to get distracted by all the demands of day-to-day life, to get weighed down by the tasks and responsibilities that a full and productive life present. More than anything else in sobriety I’ve had to really adjust my thinking. Improving my quality of life, most days, just takes looking at things in a positive light.
Meetings remind me that, despite appearances, the world isn’t out to get me. And, if I want the world, it’s me who has to go take it by storm. Things aren’t just handed to us, whether we’re sober or not. We have to work and strive for our goals and desires. We have to make tough decisions and judgement calls. But, with a positive attitude and tools for living, the footwork necessary to achieve my life’s goals doesn’t seem nearly as impossible as it once did.
And, if I forget all this by tomorrow morning, I know that all I need to do is get myself to a meeting, and I’ll be reminded.